Ever Thine…Ever Mine…Ever Ours … (Words of Love, immortalized)

Of course, I did first know about it in Sex and the City!!! And like millions of other women, I loved it, sighed with Carrie, searched for the book online and was disappointed to learn it was a fictitious invention of the show.

Well! Before many of you are wondering what on earth I am yapping about… Let me start properly by Wishing you a very Happy New Year. And what’s a better way to start my first blog this year than talk about a topic that’s my favorite-Love.

There’s a common mistake people make when I talk to them about these subjects, they jump to the conclusion that I am a Mushy-lovestruck-teenager like grown up who is still talking about Mills and Boons. And I can assure you that is so far from the truth, I find Mills and Boons books boring, sometimes irritating. My idea of love has never been ‘over expression’ ‘mush’ or ‘PDA’ and frankly I don’t believe in them either, whenever I find anybody indulging in the above- my mind automatically jumps to the conclusion that it is fake.

Don’t get me wrong, I am ‘the incurable romantic’ but I also am a lover of the genuine. For example- I love the good ol’ I love you, but what I hate and what activates my fake radar is someone uttering it multiple times a day, someone combining that simple statement with other gooey statements that make this one lose its value completely. Love can never be expressed only with words, it’s more the gestures and the action that come with or without the words which are the true indicator. Also infinitely more romantic than the loud gestures of love are often the quiet ones.

Well! Now that I have clarified that, Let me talk about those ‘words’ immortalized in the world of fiction, books, letters or poetry that touched me the most, in no particular order, presenting:

1) Ludwig Van Beethoven’s love letter to his beloved-that end’s with:

“No one else can ever possess my heart – never – never – Oh God, why must one be parted from one whom one so loves … Your love makes me at once the happiest and the unhappiest of men …

My angel, I have just been told that the mailcoach goes every day – therefore I must close at once so that you may receive the letter at once …

Be calm – love me – today – yesterday – what tearful longings for you – you – you – my life – my all – farewell. Oh continue to love me – never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.

Ever thine,

Ever mine,

Ever ours.”

This was first brought to my attention in the Sex and the City show, where Carrie reads to Big from the book ‘Love Letters of great Men’ (which is a fictional book) and as you can see its gorgeous, the entire letter is, but the last 3 sentences just hold your breath, if you can feel their depth as much as I can..Ever Thine, Ever Mine, Ever Ours…

2) Thomas Moore’s Poem/Folk song: Believe Me, if All Those Endearing Young Charms

“Believe me, if all those endearing young charms,

Which I gaze on so fondly today,

Were to change by tomorrow and fleet in my arms,

Like fairy wings fading away.

Thou wouldst still be adored, as this moment thou art,

Let thy loveliness fade as it will;

And around the dear ruin each wish of my heart

Would entwine itself verdantly still.

It is not while beauty and youth are thine own,

And thy cheeks unprofaned by a tear,

That the fervor and faith of a soul can be known,

To which time will but make thee more dear.

No, the heart that has truly loved never forgets,

But as truly loves on to the close:

As the sunflower turns on her god when he sets

The same look which she turned when he rose.”

You might be wondering, what is so special about this poem? I like it because of the reason why it was written, Thomas Moore’s wife contracted the small pox or some other skin infecting disease, which was disfiguring her and she was so stricken by this that she refused to let him or anyone see her, afraid that he would stop loving her if he saw her that way. This poem was written by Moore to tell his wife that he was despaired by her confinement and that nothing about her looks would change his love for her. It’s also said, that he sang this outside her bedroom door, post which she allowed him to see her. That’s more like love- even more a proof of love than Romeo and Juliet’s balcony verses (which I believe was infatuation)

3) Of Course Shakespeare cannot be left out: sonnet 16-

Let me not to the marriage of true minds

Admit impediments. Love is not love

Which alters when it alteration finds,

Or bends with the remover to remove:

O no! it is an ever-fixed mark

That looks on tempests and is never shaken;

It is the star to every wandering bark,

Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.

Love’s not Time’s fool, though rosy lips and cheeks

Within his bending sickle’s compass come:

Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,

But bears it out even to the edge of doom.

If this be error and upon me proved,

I never writ, nor no man ever loved.- William Shakespeare

What I love about it is these lines.. “Love alters not with brief hours and weeks, but bears it out even to the edge of doom” the other things aren’t love.

4) Elizabeth Barret Browning’s – How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, — I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! — and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

Sigh!! Beautiful..short and piercing, well all the more beautiful if truly meant.

Let me move out of the poem genre now for a bit,

5) Gone With the wind

How can I not mention this- although this book does talk about Rhett’s love for Scarllet and how she eventually realizes she loves him, it talks about many other things too. What makes the love story in this book so good, is that it is so real, I can never forget how they introduced Rhett to Scarlett in the start :

“As she chattered and laughed and cast quick glances into the house and the yard, her eyes fell on a stranger, standing alone in the hall, staring at her in a cool impertinent way that brought her up sharply with a mingled feeling of feminine pleasure that she had attracted a man and an embarrassed sensation that her dress was too low in the bosom. He looked quite old, at least thirty-five. He was a tall man and powerfully built. Scarlett thought she had never seen such a man with such wide shoulders, so heavy with muscles, almost too heavy for gentility. When her eye caught his, he smiled, showing animal-white teeth below a close-clipped black mustache. He was dark of face, swarthy as a pirate, and his eyes were as bold and black as any pirate’s appraising a galleon to be scuttled or a maiden to be ravished. There was a cool recklessness in his face and a cynical humor in his mouth as he smiled at her, and Scarlett caught her breath. She felt that she should be insulted by such a look as was annoyed with herself because she did not feel insulted. She did not know who he could be, but there was undeniably a look of good blood in his dark face. It showed in the thin hawk nose over the full red lips, and high forehead and the wide-set eyes.”

None of that gooey, eyes met, and they fell in love part-which is actually unbelievably. But eyes met and they feel an undeniable pull- totally believable.

I also like how she realizes that what she (Scarllet) had for Ashley, was not love:

“I loved something I made up, something that’s just as dead as Melly is. I made a pretty suit of clothes and fell in love with it. And when Ashley came riding along, so handsome, so different, I put that suit on him and made him wear it whether it fitted him or not. And I wouldn’t see what he really was. I kept on loving the pretty clothes-and not him at all. ”

Again so real, something many of us may have experienced.

6) Paul Neruda’s Love sonnet:

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.”

That’s how love is, isn’t it- don’t know how it starts, when and from where- there is simply no logic, no pride.

7) From Eat Pray Love

“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master…”

That’s beautifully put..a soul mate is not someone you form a perfect fit with but someone who teaches you to become a better person, no wonder sometimes love with some people can get so painful

8) From Paulo Cohelo

Quotes from different books about love, that I love:

“I think that perhaps we always fall in love the very first time we see the man of our dreams, even though, at the time, reason may be telling otherwise, and we may fight against that instinct, hoping against hope that we won’t win, until there comes a point when we allow ourselves to be vanquished by our feelings…”

“The wise are wise only because they love. The fool are fools only because they think they can understand love.”

“Love is not to be found in someone else, but in ourselves; we simply awaken it. But in order to do that, we need the other person. The universe only makes sense when we have someone to share our feelings with.”

“Freedom only exists when love is present. The person who gives him or herself wholly, the person who feels freest, is the person who loves the most.”

And there are many more from Paulo Cohelo, I love these love messages because they seem to be more spiritual and real.

There are so many more crowding in my head. But for now I’ll rest here… some other day to talk about the others..:)

Here’s to wishing you a happy 2013…filled with love.

Literature disease????

Bombay times (source of entertainment and gossip..:P I don’t care what Hindu says) today mentions something about “twilighticitis” a disease that teenagers (Bah!! they are not the only ones who read twilight :P) go through, by being obsessed with the book…and then go on to talk about- if literature can be a disease for the brains of some people….

God!!! how can they use a word like disease for something as beautiful as literature…

But yes I must agree that sometimes books do something to you, they transport you to a world- far away from this normal mundane one.. they give you something to look forward to..sigh!! they can create MAGIC!!!..

Many many books have created magic in my Life, but there are 3 (one a series)..which I can never ever forget..they continue to lift me up every time I read them, and I must have read them countless number of times by now.

The first one, I read at the age of 15, when I was in school- Jane Austen’s “Pride and Prejudice”. I remember every instance connected with this so clearly as if it was just yesterday. I was just being introduced to classics and my friend had particularly wanted me to read Pride and Prejudice.

My first reaction to that book was- Gosh!! how will I manage to sit through this (for someone whom Archie comics and Sidney Sheldon and Jeffery Archer had been the staple diet till then, sitting through a classic was tough) . 2-3 pages down and I began to like the book… I felt a very very strong affinity with Lizzie (Elizabeth) and as it usually happens with me, I started feeling her emotions as they were my own. Enter- Fitzwilliam Darcy (swoon!!!) and I was hooked, hooked forever.

The rude Darcy continued to fascinate me and I found myself praying through the book, God!! let Lizzie see him for what he is, let her see that behind all that rudeness is that steady, constant heart and the nicety. Through the book every time they met, my heart would skip a beat..and this went on till the end.. every line in that book is epic.. Lizze and Darcy ..immortal.. and needless to say I was in love, with Darcy- through Lizze. Since then I remember looking for a lil bit of Darcy in every guy I have met..:P (little did I know that MBTI would later classify Darcy as an INTJ – My fav type in the opposite sex..:) and Elizabeth as an ENFP-my type- yay!!! no wonder!!!)

Next book- rather series – was undoubtedly Harry Potter. 🙂 I am sure many of you associate with this. I can’t even begin to explain the affect this series has had on me. I began reading this book when I was in the US, I remember thinking- Gosh! I hope this isn’t a book for young children (I was 18 then) . Within a few pages of the first book, I was hooked, I could feel the same affinity, the same bond, I cried with Harry and Ron and Hermoine, I laughed with them I devoured the second and the 3rd- azkaban immediately. The fourth one hadn’t released yet (and I seriously thought I would die!!! waiting for it)

I remember pre-booking the Goblet of Fire in India, and the day it was realeased I laid my hands on it only in the evening, I remember reading it all night and some part of the next morning, I felt like if I put it down the book would disappear or be snatched away from me, similar experience for the next editions (altough I must say that the magic for me was profound for the first 4-5…I think the final 2 could have been better). I remember crying so much when Dumbledore died (I hope this ain’t a spoiler…it was so long ago) and feeling like the magic died a little with him. I remember hoping and wishing that all of this was true and somewhere there existed a land of Wizards and Witches far from us Muggles. And like most of you I took all those tests to find which houses I would belong to (Praying for Gryffindor). The magic of this series is unmistakable. Beautiful.

Now comes the third- unexpectedly the best, by far has had the most profound effect on me and that is- Gone With The Wind. This book I laid my hands on when I was 21. Just beginning to understand relationships (maybe thats why it had such an effect on me) I used to call it the break-up book. I have read it everytime I experienced something like heart break or disappointment and it has given me strength to move on, as Scarlett would put it- “After all, tomorrow is Another day” 🙂  I have read this book a minimum of 7 times at least and recommended it to so many women- as Mad as me..:P

This book is the heart-breaking story of Scarlett O’Hara and Rhett Butler set against the backdrop of  Civil War in America. It seriously is not just a love story. Once again I fell in Love- with Rhett (I think I have always had a soft corner for arrogant, misunderstood, strong men who cannot confess their emotions easily, who scorn love on the outside, but secretly want to be loved) through the book I kept again hoping that Scarlett would realize how foolish she was being and understand that Rhett was her true man, here again I could put myself in Scarlett’s shoes ( I would think – what is it about us girls? why do we always run after the wrong man, who cares nothing for us? and forget that man who loves us so very much, why could we never see it) this book actually taught me..:)

When the book ended after the first time I read it- I felt for a few days like, my reason to live was gone (M serious it isn’t an exaggeration thats how strongly I feel things..and thats how beautiful it was)

We’ll needless to say I survived..:P and even read the sequel ( Scarlett) and moved on to many many more books after this.

Like I said many books have created magic in my life, yes- including Twilight, however the top 3 are most profound (feeling like dying when the book or series ended is what I mean by profound) I can compare the magic created by these to a first kiss and safely say they were on par.. the same pulse racing excitement…similar intense emotions…same feeling of wanting it to never end..:)

If this is what is called a ‘disease’ I am so happy I have had it…:)  can’t wait for it to strike me again… let me know if you can recommend any such magical books..:)